Hi Brain... Why you gotta be difficult?

“Worrying is carrying tomorrow's load with today's strength- carrying two days at once. It is moving into tomorrow ahead of time. Worrying doesn't empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength.”  Corrie ten Boom The title of this blog really sums up anxiety, it’s the ultimate hell. No matter how hard you try and turn it off, at times it just doesn’t go away, it just lingers. Out of all my mental health, anxiety is the one I struggle the most with. It’s present every day in my life. Sometimes, it’s not that bad, but it can be crippling.   You can research the both the physical and psychological symptoms of anxiety, but unless you research into blogs, no one really tells you what it’s like day in, day out. I find my physical symptoms are raised temperature, increased and irregular heartbeat, anxiety belly (the feeling of emptiness in my stomach made worse by the feeling of butterflies), hot flushes and at times panic attacks. This often leads to diff...

            "There's no right or wrong way to manage your mental illness. You are not less of a person for needing medication or having to go to therapy multiple times a week. If something helps your mental health, take the time to do it, don't stop, no matter what other people think." Hayley Lyvers   It may seem that being medicated means that you're weak because you cannot cope. Whilst this can still be true, you cannot cope so you are medicated, it doesn't mean you're weak. It's understandable why many of us feel weak because we are having to use drugs to aid us in life, but it's not true. We take medication to enable us to get through life, to get through the day like someone without mental health and that is absolutely fine.  I have often struggled with the stigma of mental health medication and have found it a personal battle to get over the fact that I am medicated. I have been through extremely high doses for my age to lower dosages ...

“Think of your head as an unsafe neighbourhood; don't go there alone.”  For years, I have seen various psychologists and therapists, from child to adolescent and then adult. I have had group therapy, Cognitive behavioural therapy and EMDR (which is used to suppress old memories that cause distress). In the past I have found it incredibly helpful to speak to a therapist and have often found myself getting to the heart of why I feel the way I do. I have learn`pt so many techniques on how to calm myself down before panic attacks, how to prevent myself from self-harming, how to ignore negative and self-critical thoughts etc. However, therapy just doesn’t feel helpful anymore. The main reason therapy doesn’t feel helpful anymore is because sitting in a room, detailing my problems, why I feel the way I do, reminds me that I am mentally ill. I have to admit all of my problems and have to try and accept it all over again. I am at a point of my illness that it is accepted, i...

"The greatest discovery of my generation is that human beings can alter their lives by altering their attitudes of mind" William James I have this OVER self-CRITICAL and self-LOATHING voice that makes me feel crap. It ruins my day and makes me sink lower. It makes me question my decisions and my thoughts. It's essentially a bully and makes me feel as if I'm being bullied, by myself.  My appearance  The clothes I wear Life choices  If I make the tiniest mistake at work  Uni assignments  In social situations (THIS IS MAJOR) Over the past year, I have been working hard to try and eradicate this inner voice. At times, it has worked so much, but when my anxiety has spiked or I am feeling low it creeps back up on me. Here are a few methods I have used to prevent the critical voice from bullying me. 1.     The realisation that this is just an inner voice and isn't a "true voice" I have many inner voices, the voic...